Vogue Parody: 73 Questions about Me

I was nominated for the Vogue Parody: 73 Questions About Me by Nadine of Home of Understanding, Vanessa of The Wellbeing Blogger, Sunny Laure of the aptly named Sunny Larue, and Naomi of Inching Forwards. The questions attempt to allow readers to gain new insight into some of their favorite bloggers.  I am honored to be nominated by the above terrific bloggers; they are great writers with content that can be both personal and inspiring.  In addition, and perhaps more importantly, they all have a wonderful presence that elevates those around them.  Please check out their blogs and get to know their work.  While I really enjoyed answering the questions, I did so with a grain of snark.  If you are not familiar with the Vogue 73 Question series, you can access them here.  But without further wasting of additional digital space, here are my answers. 

1. What is your favourite Starbucks order?

2. What does your workstation look right now?

You mean my desk?

3. All-time favourite food

Mom’s Thanksgiving stuffing that I just can’t seem to replicate.

4. Favourite author?

James Clavell and Herman Wouk wrote two of my favorite novels. 

5. What do you think of open relationships?

Awesome!

6. What is your favourite video game?

Civilization; The Ultimate Time Suck.

7. Guilty Pleasure treat?

I don’t know.  I never feel guilty when I eat.  I’m lucky!

8. Favourite movie?

Really?  Do I have to pick one? I hope they don’t ask for my favorite book!

9. Favourite book?

Oh crap!.  Ok… I’ll play along.  Shogun and Winds of War. Are we besties now?

10. Twitter or Instagram?

Twitter.  I don’t get the appeal of Instagram. 

11. Desktop or laptop?

Desk

12. Best advice you have ever received?

Don’t pee on the snow. Some idiot might eat it.

13. What project are you working on right now?

A never-ending list of questions that is reminding me of my experience playing Civilization. 

14. Favourite colour?

Really? So, if I say purple or green, are all the people who have that same FAVORITE COLOR going to be excited? We have a connection now?  

15. Did you get good grades at school?

Yes! And some very bad grades as well!

16. Dream job?

I have it.  I am a professor of music.  Very lucky!

17. Played any sports?

Tennis, Basketball, Soccer.  Baseball was my worst.  I’m #7,

18. Do you have a degree?

Yes. Many. 

19. Nationality?

20. What is your favourite kind of blog post to do?

When writing, potentially any of them. I suppose I’m lucky that I don’t rely upon blogging to make a living, and thus don’t feel burdened to gain more viewers; so I just write whatever I want at the moment.  When reading, I am particularly moved and inspired by those who become vulnerable by sharing their experiences.

21. What do you like to collect?

According to my wife, unpaired socks. 

22. Describe yourself in three words.

Really?

23. If you were a rapper, what would your rapper name be?

24. Who was the last person you DM’d

The lovely Leslie from Up Forward with Purpose.

25. What is on top of your wishlist right now?

My wife and I put in an order for a baby who doesn’t cry and sleeps through the night.  Unfortunately, these types of babies are in high demand so we are pretty low on the waiting list.  Fingers crossed!

26. Sorting House?

27. How many tattoos do you have?

None.

28. What are you most grateful for this year?

My senses and the health of myself and family.

29. What is the best thing that has happened to you this month?

Family Vacation at Marble Mountain Ranch for my Dad’s 75th Birthday

30. What’s the best thing that has happened to you today?

Working on this post. 

31. What’s the best thing ever?

Surely you can’t be serious?

32. Favourite season?

Winter in South Texas, which is where I currently live. It’s really the only option for this question. 

33. Favourite fictional animal?

Honestly?  Ok… fine! A Hippogriff.  Are we besties yet?   

34. What fictional character do you relate to the most?

35. Do you like surprises?

I love them; unless I’m completely unprepared, but I think that’s only common sense.  

36. What is the biggest surprise you have ever had?

When my wife told me what she was getting me for Christmas. 

37. What is a surprise that made you cry?

When I had no idea that my friends were throwing me a surprise party.

38. What is the best surprise you have ever given someone?

When I failed a student, waited until he was crying and then told him I was just kidding.

39. Do you like muffins!

Of course. I’m not insane. 

40. Do you cook often?

No.  That’s why I got married. 

41. What is your favourite dessert?

Any cake but fruit cake. 

42. Is there a dessert you don’t like?

No.  It’s just a question of degrees of awesomeness. 

43. Cake or pie?

Cake!

44. What’s your least favourite food?

Oysters. 

45. What is your favourite condiment?

Body.

46. It’s 4 am on a Saturday night, what would you eat?

Greek yogurt with walnuts. Are we besties yet?

47. If you could teach a college class, what would it be called?

Ummm!

48. Best animated film?.

Jiminy Cricket!  Oh, wait!

49. What has a guy (or girl) done or said to impress you?

“Slaughterhouse? Really?  That sounds interesting.” – Jerry Seinfeld

50. The best thing to do on a date?

Talk about yourself as much as possible; especially previous long term relationships; it shows that you are capable of commitment. Opening the car door, but then slamming it as hard as you can once they are inside; it’s about safety.   Eye rolling when they ask you any sort of “favourite” question.  Push the dinner check in her direction; don’t worry, it’s about female empowerment.

51. The worst thing to do on a date?

Asking her lots of questions; it’s important not to come across as nosy.  Telling her she looks nice; she is more than just her looks you, idiot.    

52. What is the funniest pickup line a guy/girl could use on a guy/girl?

No one ever picked me up; and believe me, it wasn’t from lack of opportunities and availability. 

53. Best comic book character?

Gee willikers!!

54. What are three things that are always in your purse?

55. Favourite drink?

Water.  To expand; I don’t drink coffee or alcohol. Don’t I sound like fun?

56. If you could play a historical character, who would it be?

No one deserves my truly terrible acting to represent them.  It’s honestly awful!

57. Kittens or puppies?

Since I won’t associate with those who harbor kittens.

58. Favourite sushi roll?

Sushi is not food. It’s a test on Survivor.

59. What kind of lipstick do you use?

Matt Lipstick; Orange Pink.  Oh wait….

60. What kind of foundation do you use?

This is too personal. 

61. Blow dry or air dry?

Hair questions offend me.

62. Who is your fashion icon?

Russell Westbrook obviously.

63. Favourite Disney Character?

Whichever one spells “favorite” the correct way. 

64. What are you doing tomorrow?

Winnie the Pooh said it best when talking about today: “My favorite day. Yesterday, when it was tomorrow, it was too much day for me.”

65. Movie you laughed the hardest through?

Naked Gun: From the Files of Police Squad.

66. Movie that made you cry?

Any movie where animals and pets are in danger.  Watership Down!

67. If you could sing a duet with someone, who would it be?

The lead singer of Sexual Chocolate. 

68. If your life was a song, what would the title be?

Wha wha-whaaaa! 

69. Favourite animal?

70. The person you would want to have coffee with?

71. Favourite illustrator?

Whoever did this!

72. What’s the country you wish to visit?

Norway.  Don’t know why. 

73. Best way to decompress?

Massage.

My Nominees

I tag the following bloggers:

The Sacred Space

Kabhifactkabhifiction

TheMindberg

My Unexpected Life: Tales of Travel Food and More

Insecure Housewife: Journey To A More Confident Life

Daisy and Thyme

Mystical Surrender

Finding the Fearless Life

Up and Forward on Purpose

Mommin’ in the Real World: Everyday is a New Adventure

Lellalee

My Shades of Emerald